Love lost
by JustPlainAmy
Summary: " I love you... so.. much Merlin you know that?" Merlin seemed shocked by his question his face suspiciously blank as the corner of his mouth twitched down as he nodded his head. "I love you and the ... baby... take care of them... they need you, promise me you won't give up... our baby needs you, promise you won't be an idiot" Arthur tried to smile as he felt himself fading away.
1. Chapter 1

Hey I hope you like this drabble the prompt tht enspired me to write this is right here - I want Arthur to die nobly, with his head in Merlin's lap. And Merlin would be brave, up untill Arthur took his last breath. Then he would just break. This would be horrible and beautiful in equal parts.

I have the photo prompt posted on tumblr if you want to check it out my user name is Blueyes987 :) have fun with it.

Disclamer: I own nothing, not the character nadda.

Warning: M to be safe fo gore

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It had been a wonderful morning, the light was shining, the kingdom was happy and Merlin and Arthur had just spent most of the morning just laying in the King's bed. Merlin was reading aloud a book that the blonde had been adamant about reading even as he dozed off rubbing Merlin's stomach with small soothing circles as if he was willing the much too young baby inside to answer back with a rub or a kick of his own. That was until nearly all of Merlin's wards had been tripped on the east side of the wall making both men rush to dress for battle Merlin glaring at the blonde the entire time as if to say "try and stop me" as Arthur ran to gather the guards and the knights to defend Camelot.

It seemed as if time was moving to fast and too slow at the same time, which in actuality thing were happening so fast he couldn't, no wouldn't try to understand what was happened just attempting to focus on protecting Arthur, his main job while watching the knights out of the corner of his eye.

Weapons clashing, the sound of steel upon steel ringing in all of their ears and the king struck with a force that could only be described as furious. And the made sense in a way, he was angry that these people, this witch and her followers had felt so wronged by Uther they attacked Camelot, over a 1000 foot soldiers attacking without warning interrupting the wonderful peace that Arthur had managed to fabricate out of seemingly nowhere. making everyone feel safe and happy and _they_ were no trying to ruin it and that seemed pretty much intolerable.

Everything seemed to have been going fine Merlin nearly taking the surprise army on by himself with his lover by his side along with the knights and a hundred of the guards fighting as hard as they could to protect their beloved city.

The battle was nearing a close, with Merlin taking dozens of men out at a time as Arthur shouted order and parried blows before returning them with equal vigor, that was until the woman who had orchestrated the entire attack finally immerged into the battle. And rather than fighting directly as they had expected her to she appeared directly in front of Merlin her gray eyes wicked with madness as she quickly used her magic to paralyze him and hold him in place, he was frozen on the spot even as she drew her dagger and stabbed for his heart. There was nothing Merlin could do even as the King lunged forward driving his sword deeply into her chest even as the dagger that had been meant for Merlin buried itself deep in Arthur's own stomach. The instant the sword met the witch she began to slowly disintegrate along with most of the men that she had created to fight for her, almost all of them dissolving to dust as Arthur fell to his knees mouth open in a silent scream both hands cradling the dagger that was still embedded in him.

Right then and there something snapped inside Merlin as he rushed forward in time to catch Arthur as he slumped backward, clutching the young king tight as his eyes rolled back in pain. Carefully laying Arthur back him head resting in his lap as Arthur struggled to keep cries of pain behind his clenched teeth as Merlin began to unceremoniously rip off all the kings army with his bare hands and a few spells aiding the way even as the Knights surrounded him in a neat circle their faces pinched with worry as they silently protected their king and their friend from the enemies still attacking violently but never breaking the tight circle.

'He had to save him, Arthur couldn't die , that couldn't happen it just wasn't possible' but even as he repeated his mantra in his head his eyes took in the image of the slightly blackened blood pouring out of Arthur's wound. It was clear the dagger had been coated with some sort of poison as the veins crawling up his stomach turned black and sickly even as Merlin eyes burned gold pulling out the dagger working furiously to close the wound and the poison all the while stroking Arthur's blood and mud covered hair whispering that it would be all right.

But even Merlin's magic couldn't stop the poison from spreading as fast as it was let alone remove it, Merlin knew it and after a minute or two Arthur knew it too as his vision started to blur slightly as the pain in his stomach began to grow spreading to his chest and legs. So he used the last of his strength to pull down Merlin into a soft kiss on the lips Merlin refused to stop chanting, refused to stop whispering "you're going to be fine you clot pole" and other things like it.

" I love you... so.. much Merlin you know that?" Merlin seemed shocked by his question his face suspiciously blank as the corner of his mouth twitched down as he nodded his head.

"I love you and the ... baby... take care of them... they need you, promise me you won't give up... our baby needs you, promise you won't be an idiot" Arthur tried to smile as any feelings in his legs suspiciously vanished and without checking he knew that he couldn't move his legs any longer. Merlin's face turned from it's horrifying blankness to such a heartbreaking attempt at a smile that immediately turned to a grimace at his lovers joke as he cradled Arthur's head in his hand kissing him quickly.

"I... I-, I promise, and I love you so much" his words were punctuated with Merlin pulling him closer, Arthur's chest was starting to freeze up he could barely make himself speak at this point and that made him that little bit more desperate as he leaned up with Merlin meeting him in no sound reached them as they kissed even as Gwain began to sob quietly and the only reason Lancelot was still standing up was because Leon was holding him up even as the large man began to cry, tears clearing tracks down his dirty face as they all continued to smite any one who dared approach them.

In the middle of the kiss Merlin felt rather than saw as Arthur went slack in his arms on last gasping breath as his beautiful clear eyes stared lifelessly up at Merlin his now lifeless hand still cupping Merlin's slightly rounded stomach. Arthur his King, his love, his best friend, his Childs father... was dead.

And then Merlin broke.

An _incredibly_ loud and bone chilling scream of rage seemed to echo throughout the entirety of Camelot as Merlin began to glow with his power breaking through the surface murder and rage inside his deadened eyes as he stood somehow managing to pick up Arthur's body with a frightening ease for such a small man. Holding him bridal style as he pushed the knights out of the way. Tears were pouring down his face but doing nothing to lesson the terror of anyone who witnessed sweet kind Merlin swiftly kill the entire remaining force.

It was an awful sight as each man died a different way each more painful than the last his magic literally ripping a majority of them apart screaming as he did so their blood watering the ground. Screaming his rage, his pain at his loss. Walking into the empty streets of Camelot people still hiding in their homes a few emerging at Merlin's chilling wraith like cries that seemed to shake the very core of a person as he walked to the castle people emerging to join in his cries of grief at the loss of their beloved king when they saw who Merlin was carrying. But still no one dared to come close to the wizard afraid that he might lash out and kill them like he had done to the soldiers outside the city walls.

Finally he reached the castle not bothering to speak to anyone he summoned his magic, which seemed to be even more willing than usual as it carried him soundlessly to their shared bed chambers finally laying the king onto their bed giving a moment to cast a preservation charm on him and curled up onto the bed sobbing messily like a child into the dead man's chest.

He would Join Arthur one day but first he had to live, live for the Child Arthur had been able to love so desperately as he had for only the two weeks that had been given to them. Yes he would live for them, he would do his best to substitute for Arthur as their son or daughter grew into a proper king or queen, because he would not allow Camelot to suffer because it was yet another thing that Arthur had loved so dearly.

(_Very short epilogue)_

"Come along Ygraine we're going to visit Arthur today" Merlin did his best to hide the slight pain in him as Ygraine came bouncing into view her golden curls bobbing around here face, Blue eyes that would have matched Arthur's stared up at her Daddy waving a parchment that seemed to be splashed with various colors. When he went to ask after it only to have the little 5 year old held up her hand to stop Merlin from speaking as if reading his mind... Actually knowing Ygraine she probably was, seeing as it was the only aspect of hr magic that she could control as young as she was.

"Daddy, this is for Papa" she said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. Merlin should have been used to this. The little princess had insisted at least the last 10 times when they went to see her papa that she always had a present made for him even oblivious to the fact that every time she does it makes the King regent tear up.

So they were off making the rather long walk around the castle to an older restored cathedral that at this point only held one thing, the glass coffin that still held the perfectly preserved body of the once and forever King Arthur Pendragon. Merlin went every day spending at least an hour just talking to his love, hours earlier than when Igraine is up. And when the guards backs are turned he always tries just a little bit to bring his dead lover back, of course it never works but that only pierces the warlock even deeper as he looks upon the serene face through the glass.

And now today just like every Saturday he would bring Igraine to see her Papa. He knew it was probably unhealthy for him to allow this but he had never been able to deny the small part of Arthur he had left in the daughter that meant eons more to him than his own life. So he brought her there and seeing her place her "present" for Arthur on the floor beside the coffin as she greets him. This tears viciously at the wound inside him that still feels just as fresh as it did nearly 6 years ago. He felt as if nothing had healed just that he'd gotten better at hiding it from the people around him...From Ygraine.

She sat on Merlin's lap and babbled happily telling her Papa just what fantastic things had happened in the last week ( in this case her starting her schooling with Gwen and learning her letters). once she was done she got up kissed the part of the glass case that she could reach whispering.

"Bye Papa, love you" and as Merlin tried to hold back the emotions that threatened to overwhelm him her eyes flashes a light green before skipping out of the tomb to talk to one of the guards standing right outside. With Ygraine busy he allowed a moment to himself to remove the glass lid and placing a kiss on Arthur's still warm form before conjuring the lid back in place he could only readjust his neckerchief as he strode out after the energetic princess. Doing his best to stay calm as he whispered goodbye to the room and heading out the door.

Even as crystal clear blue eyes snapped open.

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I'm sorry I know I wanted to make this a sad fic for the prompt but I had to give hope! My shipper heart is fragile I couldn't help adding the last line even though I didn't really intend for that to happy. I hoped you liked It! reveiw are nice they make writing these sad things worth it.


	2. Chapter 2

Arthur-ish POV, Hey evryone! everyone was begging/yelling at me for not writing a sequal so I guess here it is! tada! :D

Disclamer: Again I own absolutley nothing

Warning:M/M pairings, mentions of mpreg if you don't like it please don't burden yourself with the _distatste _of reading it and have a fantastic day!

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The first things he registered was the way his vision was slightly warped, was he going blind? That question was answered within a few minutes of blinking when the sight of pristine glass over his face made him nervous as his vision cleared. Hopelessly disoriented he tried to move his arms and found them stiff to the point of pain he wanted out of this box but he figured a minute of trying to warm his muscles up wouldn't hurt him. This gave him time to wonder what the hell he was doing in this empty place, trying to remember what had happened that he was trapped in the box.

Finally he broke through the fog his brain had seemingly created and now there was no stopping it as everything from the day before flooded to him. He could remember everything Merlin's eyes flashing bright, slipping away into complete blackness. But something about that didn't make sense was that if he had blacked out and not died that why the hell was he here and not in Gaius with Merlin by his side.

Merlin! was Merlin alright?! the damn fool should have stayed back at the castle he should be resting in his condition... For the first time since he had awaken he could feel a tiny adoring smile as he pictured his son making Merlin's Stomach round...or Daughter. Merlin had been lecturing him about already naming a gender when the young man wasn't even far enough along for it to show.

He had to get out and find Merlin get him to explain why the hell he was in a box... In His bloody armor and crown?! Yes he definitely had to get out move his arms again he found less resistance and only winced slightly at the pain as he raised his palms to the glass pushing with all his might dragging the heavy thing off of him slowly succeeding in not dropping it and breaking into a million pieces.

Standing on wobbly legs he attempted to get the blood flowing into them also eventually getting the feeling of pinpricks surging through his entire lower half especially around the place were he was... Yanking his shirt and chain male up he stared at his stomach disbelief washing through him as he gazed upon a single neat incision looking white scar were he had felt The Witch's dagger enter him.

Yanking off one glove he reached down starting to trail his pointer finger over the scar only to yank his hand back as if he had been burned. It... was... Cold, freezing in a way that nothing alive should be... dropping his shirt he did his best to ignore the unease he felt from it. Setting himself back on task he had to find Merlin and make sure the Idiot was ok, then demand answers that hopefully Merlin will have.

Cautiously looking around the corner he saw two very armed guards at the entrance way to the place he had recognized as the Cathedral he used to play hide and seek in the dilapidated pews with Morgana before they had grown apart. He hadn't remembered it at first because of course everything was gone only that blasted box was there along with a small chair leaning against the wall.

Making as little noise as possible he quickly ducked out of his armor only letting his sword remain on his hip and his crown to be placed inside the pocket of the cloak that had been placed over him. That done he shrugged it on leaving the hood down as he decided that surely Merlin would be waiting for him in their chambers. He quickly ducked out the back entrance (A small hole in the back room of the church) making his way around the market totally oblivious to the stares he was getting from his people, not even when a few of them shouted towards him, none of it really reaching him as he made his way to the castle to find Merlin.

Slipping in the servants door he made his way through the kitchens vaguely wondering if something was wrong as one of the servants screamed, but for some reason that didn't matter something was driving him to Merlin and he felt like he couldn't have had stopped if he wanted to. Upon reaching the door to his court sorcerer and his rooms he was greeted by two guards who promptly upon seeing his face one of them crossing themselves ask the other whose hand was shaking while gripping his sword, spoke up.

"Who and what are you?" There was still fear in his voice as he stood before them his expression gob smacked, obviously the should have recognized their king, didn't they?

"What do you mean you and what I am?! It's me Arthur Pendragon! Your King, What is the meaning of this?" They both started at his words as if they hadn't really expected him to answer. The one that crossed himself seemed less frightened by his answer but the terror he had shown was now replaced with righteous anger as he slowly withdrew his sword from it's sheath raising it only slightly before speaking.

"Do no mock our pain Sorcerer, Our King is Six years dead buried in a box of glass it the old Chapel" His words hit Arthur in the gut as if they were an actual physical force, now he was the one shaking. Six years? how could this be? Dead, but he was... Alive, he had just woken up from a coma or something in that- holy hell that wasn't a box... it was his coffin. Trying to keep his voice steady even as his face tinted green feeling sick he stared at the door behind the men who had both now drawn their swords.

" I Need to see Merlin now" The guards took up a fighting stance as he stepped forward more than a little hysterical, he'd blame that feeling later as he swiftly disarmed the guards and knocked them out opening the door slowly to see Merlin, his sweet, sweet Merlin sitting on their bed with a tiny blonde girl sitting on his lap both entranced with whatever book that Merlin was reading aloud from.

But the second he stepped inside Merlin's Head snapped up and it was all he could do not to gasp. He looked horrible dark circles under his eyes, pale skin making him appear over all very unhealthy, but worst of all the little twinkle of happiness that never failed to sparkle in his eyes was gone... And that made the already shaken Arthur feel like crying.

He wasn't sure what he was expecting but he wasn't expecting when Merlin quickly grabbed the little girl and placed her beside the bed before standing in between Arthur who had yet to move from the door way and the little girl who looked frustrated at not being able to see Arthur around Merlin. And Merlin Oh dear god, his eyes glowed gold with a fury he had never seen directed at him and he suddenly realized why their enemies usually turned tail and ran after seeing Merlin in battle, and it was terrifying.

"Who are you and how dare you show yourself in a form like that, I command you leave this place at once" Merlin's voice was powerful rattling the windows as his magic almost swirled visibly around him, ebony hair lifting slightly in non existent breeze. Apparently Merlin had come to the same conclusion as the guards... this was so not good.

"Merlin It's me, it's Arthur, What is this rubbish about me being dead? Don't tell me it's a joke and Gwaine decided it would be fun to put me in a coffin for laughs…..please?" The attempted joke and bravado didn't last his voice growing weak and scared as he gazed upon the face of his lover which was burning with hatred and shock as Arthur slowly sank to the floor against the door jamb his knees much to wobbly to keep him standing much longer.

"Papa!" a sweet little voice proclaimed making Merlin wince, not quick enough to stop the little blonde girl from bounding over the bed and attaching herself Securely to Arthur's neck with fragile little arms, shocking Arthur but not enough for him not to hug back suddenly understanding just who she was…. Merlin looked frozen on the spot and only when Arthur looked up did he break out of a trance moving forward like he was going to snatch the little girl that was currently snuggling into his neck.

As their eyes met Arthur did his best to put on a very uncharacteristically self depreciating smile it coming out shaky at best as tears brimmed over onto his eyelashes.

"I guess I was wrong about it definitely being a boy? I probably should listen to you more, What did you say? That I was a clot pole for already trying to name them After our fathers before you were even showing ." He could see Just then the heavy anger that had been hovering around Merlin drop from the man as a tiny whimper tore it's way up the now incredibly fragile looking man's throat as he recognized the words.

Arthur just buried his face in the blonde curls of his daughter, looking into her eyes as she lifted her head seeing what looked like his own stare back at him as she happily gave him a smacking kiss on the lips as guards burst into the room ignoring Arthur and shouting that the kings body was missing, only to turn tail and essentially run when Arthur stood with his little girl on his hip giving them a slightly shark toothed smile and telling him that he wasn't missing at all, in fact he was right here.

As soon as they had left he walked cautiously to his love putting down his daughter as he wrapped his arms around Merlin's pale form smiling a little when he felt little arms wrap around one of his legs while the other did the same to one of Merlin's just standing there a bit.

After what seemed like forever Merlin seemed to thaw out, guilt shining in his eyes as he stared at Arthur and then down to their daughter speaking quietly so quiet that even he could barely hear the words whispered brokenly into his shoulder.

"I'm so sorry I couldn't save you" These words were interrupted by yet another hiccupping sob making Arthur just tighten his hold on the warlock as he continued.

"... instead of naming her after our fathers like you wanted I figured I do the next best thing... Arthur... meet Ygraine, Ygrain Hunith Pendragon. It's been so hard without you we've both missed you so much" The entire thing only interrupted as Merlin struggled to pull himself together as he clutched Arthur's red cloak as if he was a drowning man and Arthur was the rock keeping his head above the rapids.

He couldn't bare to see Merlin like this, so he simply lifted Merlin's chin with a finger and kissed him softly like he had been wanting to since had woken up in that trice be damned coffin. He was there now and that was what mattered he'd catch up as much as he could and as much it pained him to know he hadn't been their for his daughter he knew that he had know to make up for that for failing the two of them. And honestly who was he to question how he was back at all? It would probably bug him later but right now he was content to kiss Merlin's tears away and never relinquish the grip he had on little Ygraine's hand.


End file.
